Hey, everybody!
The picture above contains the majority of my notebooks, but not all of them... I know. I have a problem. But I was just thinking tonight that I've been buying notebooks for years (simply because I love them), but I haven't really had any ideas for how to fill them. It seems rather pointless to just buy a bunch of notebooks and never write in them! Tonight I realized that maybe the reason I've been buying all of these notebooks is because God has been preparing me for the journey ahead of me, and it involves a lot of writing!
This is the first time I'm mentioning this on my blog, but in March of this year, I developed anxiety. It hasn't been an easy thing to work through, but God has been so faithful to me through it. I have had numerous nights where I felt like I was never going to make it because my emotions were just so out of whack. I've also had days where I felt like my heart was just going to jump out of my chest from pounding so hard. I experienced a bit of that today when my blood sugar went low, and I was worried that I was going to go into a coma (did I mention I'm a type one diabetic?).
But through it all, God has been my anchor. He has always been there for me, and He always will! He's been teaching me some really wonderful things through this season of my life, and I really feel led to share these things with you!
That is what I'm going to fill these notebooks with. My thoughts, feelings, and the lessons that God is teaching me through this journey. My counselor told me fairly early on in our meetings that I should try journaling my feelings so that I could process them, so I already have one full journal filled and another about half-way done.
I just think that it's funny...
I have always loved notebooks, and I've always loved writing. I also have recently discovered an interest in making YouTube videos, so I made
my own channel! So it seems that God is combining a ton of my talents and interests into one thing that I may be able to use in order to bring Him glory! Like I said, I started a
YouTube channel and I've talked about anxiety on it before, but I'm planning on continuing to use that as a platform to share what God is teaching me. Not all of it even relates directly to anxiety, but they are things that God has been showing me
through the anxiety.
I just know that God never wastes the pain that we go through. He loves us, and He will never inflict pain without bringing something new out of it. So I know that the pain I have been through with my anxiety will be used somehow, and it may be through this blog, my journals, or YouTube.
So the point in all of this is that I'm feeling like God is really starting to open up a door for me. It's just that I have all of these interests and talents that are all coming together to culminate into something that could make an impact for God's kingdom. In light of that, I'm taking the next step that I see before me, and that's to just make some videos, maybe write some blog posts. I don't know where God is taking me, but I know that it's going to be good.:)
~Kendra :)
